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Most of you know about the Recovery Revolution project, but if you don’t you should go check it out! We’re rolling right along with it! Something that has come to my attention, in this process, is that I’ve gotten fairly skilled at distinguishing Self-Centered Fear from an Intuitive Nudge! Now, let me be clear – I love straight-up fear. For instance, I have a healthy fear of alcohol and drugs that has helped to keep me clean and sober for 19 years. And I take precautions when I walk down a dark alley in a bad neighborhood (in a big city, or in my mind.) It’s really the destructive, self-centered fear that causes problems in my life. So I’d love to share with you what I believe are some fundamental differences between the two.
Feels urgent and panicked, like I must take an immediate action to push, fix or forward something. It’s ego driven. It either diminishes my talent, skills, or personality in some way or it’s aiming for a result where my ego will be stroked. There are a lot of reasons or rationalizations around it formed as thoughts, so it’s very heady and complex. There’s almost always a big, complex, or chaotic emotion attached to it.
More like straightforward information, unattached to emotion or reasons. Sometimes it doesn’t make sense but feels accurate. For the most part, it has nothing to do with me but more to do with peace, service, and workability. Calm and certain – a solid, quiet certainty underneath all the chaos. It’s in my gut, not in my head.
Learning to distinguish between the two has been a journey for me. By working the steps, I am able to clear away all the clutter of my mind and soul, to get to some fundamental truths about myself. Then, with regular prayer and meditation, I’ve been able to call my authentic self forward, so I am better able to recognize what is really aligned with who I am and who God would have me be.
As a result of regular practice, if I feel afraid or uncertain about something, and I take the time to sit still until my mind stops racing, or until I can let go of the burning desire to take action in a situation, I can get to a place of calm and stillness. And that is where my intuition lives. I’m definitely not perfect, and the times that I find myself acting counter-intuitively have actually been some of the best lessons in knowing what to do next time! Progress, not perfection!
So I’ve used my intuition in the Recovery Revolution Project in the following way, recently: We were pushing for a launch date in mid August and it wasn’t working. Some of our interviewees have had family stuff come up, or were out of town on some of the dates we wanted to talk with them. Self centered fear would have me push, push, push and work like a maniac to get it done by August, because if we don’t, “nothing will ever work out,” and/or it will prove that I’m a “pathetic loser.” See how self centered fear is really quite rude?
Intuitively, I know that the right thing to do is to aim high, do my best, maintain my integrity, and surrender the whole thing to Big G. That said, it’s looking like the launch will be a bit later than expected and I do know, intuitively, that a new launch date means diddly squat!
If you want to know more about the Recovery Revolution #1 project: Recovery Revolutionaries Delivering What Matters, you can check it out on our site. Just click on the paper bag Recovery Revolution icon in the sidebar. You know what they say: A good stew takes time to brew! Until next time– don’t drink, drug, or try to off yourself!
Recovery Worth Recovering For